Thoughts on Secret Invasion

So Marvel has just wrapped up their latest "event" storyline, Secret Invasion. The Skrulls have been turned back, human civilization in the Marvel U. will go on, and The Green Goblin is in charge of the Avengers.

Huh?

All in all, I thought Secret Invasion was one of Marvel's better crossover stories. The Skrulls for a long time have been a joke, and it was nice to see one of the cornerstones of the Marvel U. reestablished as a serious threat, the most serious they've been since the Kree/Skrull war 40 years ago. The "death" of the Wasp (come on, not even Bucky stays dead anymore. If Uncle Ben comes back in Brand New Day, I quit) was handled in a exquisitely cold and brutal way, and the backlash from the heroes was masterfully done.

As Civil War tackled the idea of security over liberty and how it pertains to life in 21st Century America, I enjoy how Secret Invasion made s statement on how American society will take that freedom from whoever looks the part. Norman Osborn icing the Skrull queen and becoming grand poobah of national security only because it was seen all over television in the Marvel U. was a masterstroke, and I can't wait to see what the "Dark Avengers" have up their sleeve. Naysayers might argue it is insanity that the Green Goblin could be put in charge of national safety, but I would contend that believing a idiot cocaine and alcohol abuser could keep us safe in our universe is ridiculous as well. Norman Osborn has become the premiere villain in the Marvel U., and I can't wait to see how a trillion dollar budget is put to use torturing Spider-Man.

Speaking of douchebags in charge of our safety, what happens to Tony Stark? The man who has been King Douchebag since Captain America was killed has lost everything, and much like the "Demon in a Bottle" story, I'm curious to see how he'll pick up the pieces. All the Iron Man books have been written marvelously since Civil War, and I'm sure the creators are going to have a field day turning the former top cop into one of the vigilante's he was hunting. The fact that Thor and Cap still want nothing to do with him was beautifully captured at the end of Secret Invasion, and we'll see how many friends Tony Stark truly has left.

Lenil Yu's pencils were extraordinary, and I know some people have complained about Brian Michael Bendis' Avengers run, but looking back on how he set Secret Invasion up, weaving clues in here and there, I'd say he, Ed Brubaker, and Geoff Johns are the absolute best writers in comics today. There will be some headaches trying to weave characters who have been gone back into continuity (Mockingbird is back?), but overall, Secret Invasion was just as powerful and earth-shaking for the Marvel U. as Civil War. And Invasion actually came out on time! When the collected edition comes out, anyone who has ever read a Marvel comic should pick it up. 9 out of 10.

Gabbin' About God

I'm not a religious guy. Do I think there is something out there, that the universe isn't simply a cosmic accident? Yes. Do I think that human beings have figured out what that "something" is? No. Organized religion has done far more harm than good on this earth, and I think it's the height of arrogance to tell someone you've got the inside track on the meaning of life and what waits in the afterlife. Me? I just don't know what waits in the great beyond. But I decided long ago if I love my family and friends, and treat people with dignity and respect, in any decently run universe I'm gonna be okay.



So as a result, I haven't really talked to god for years. As a kid, no matter what your religious leanings, you talk to god all the time. Especially when you get in trouble. "God, help me out of this jam, and I swear I won't do anything bad again." As if god, whatever it may be, is going to buy that. But as I got older, as I took a deeper look at the world around me and the atrocities people carry out in the name of "god", I phased the "help me out, god!" phrase out of my lexicon.



That has changed slightly, now that I am mere days away from being a Dad. Ten days until our "official" due date, I've become that celestial deal-making teenager that I was 15 years ago. When your wife could pop any minute, you don't sleep too deeply, and late at night, I have discovered to my great surprise that I'm starting to converse once again with a mythic figure I'm not sure exists.



"God, please let my son be healthy. Let everything be okay. That's all I ask."



I even start negotiating, as if I'm asking too much.



"He can even be on the fugly side. I can work with that. Just let him come out whole and hearty."



I have no reason to worry. My wife and I are both in excellent health, all of our tests have come back with happy results. I even shouldn't worry about Max's looks, as my wife is beautiful (and I think I'm no slouch in the cosmetic dept.)



But until that peanut shows up, I find myself imagining every nightmare scenario that has very little chance of happening, but there's still that .000009% chance, dammit!



I won't be going to church anytime soon, and this certainly isn't a call for all expectant parents to become over-protective whack-jobs. All I'm saying is that when you become responsible for that little person who comes into your life, your perspective changes greatly. I have every reason to believe that Max will be fine, but until I see with my own eyes that he is fine, I'll continue to imagine everything that could go wrong and try to strike some deals with some spooky ethereal father figure. I when I can see for my own eyes that said father-figure exists, then I'll pop into the nearest church, synagogue, or mosque. We're human beings, and by nature we're skeptical of things we can't see, whether that's some kind of god, or a child who is hale and hearty.



So next time you see your folks, tell them you understand why they worried about you so much. Becoming responsible for that little person changes everything, even if that little person is 23. We even start making deals with mythic figures!

William Shatner's Raw Nerve

Bill Shatner. So many things to so many people. I find it funny that the one thing he was known for for so many years, Star Trek, is now one of the last things I associate him with these days. Word association with William Shatner usually pulls out of me the terms "egomaniac", "Price line guy", "good natured self-parody", "Futurama guest star", and of course "Denny Crane".

No matter how you view William Shatner, one thing cannot be ignored: The man has an uncanny ability to reinvent his career and make himself relevant to each ensuing pop culture generation. His latest project appears on the Biography channel, and it's called Shatner's Raw Nerve. In a series of (supposedly) unscripted interviews, Shatner talks to famous folk who have had their share of challenges and and setback in their careers. While I wonder how "raw" the show is, it does have a raw feel while not looking cheap, and it fosters an engaging ambiance. Oprah Winfrey can have her massive stage and hundreds of in-studio audience members. Raw Nerve is just two people, sitting in opposing love seats, talking to each other for half an hour. It's an intimate show, and you feel like the only audience member in the world because of it.

Another distinction from the Oprah style of interview is that none of the questions are softballs. Again, who knows how "unscripted" this show is, but the dialogue comes across in a much more improvisational style that a pre-planned one. In the first episode with interviewee Valerie Bertinelli, Shatner presses her on her past addiction problems, and before you know it the conversation has spun into Catholic ideals and how deeply Bertinelli truly believes in the concept of heaven or hell. And she gets a little flustered about it to boot!

The biggest knock on the show is this: If you care about the guest, you'll probably love the episode. If you don't care however, you probably won't care at the end of 30 minutes, either. Whether it's Shatner, the questioning, or the style of the show, something about the program falls just a little short. I really don't care about Valerie Bertinelli, and I started tuning out as the interview went on. However, the next guest was Tim Allen, someone I'm a little more engaged in, so conversely I was a little more engaged in the show.

Talk shows are a dime a dozen today (Tyra Banks?), and interchangeable, in my opinion. But Raw Nerve is fresh and different, and everyone should give it a try. I wouldn't jump into it as appointment viewing right off the bat, but check your listings for a guest you're interested in (Tuesday nights on Bio) and see what you think. For all the distance he's achieved from the Star Trek days, Bill Shatner has once again started to explore the final frontier: A fresh talk show format.

WCCW Review 5/21/83

Let me say for the record, I love the conversational chemistry between Michael Hayes and Kevin von Erich. Kevin puts Terry Gordy over huge, and Hayes gives us his "total restaurant experience" metaphor again to explain that World Class was becoming more about the Freebirds v. The von Erichs, as the influx of talent was setting the promotion on fire (Iceman Parsons, the Vachons, ect.) Fine, but let's not fool anyone: WCCW was about the Freebirds v. The von Erichs.



Paul "The Butcher" Vachon v. Tora Yatsu. More of this goofy heel v. heel action. How can you be a dreaded Asian assassin while wearing bicycle pants? Armand Hussien wants Vachon out of the ring so Yatsu can do his warm-up. Of classic heel stalling tactics, that's one of the lamer ones. They test each other off of lock-ups and chops, which Vachon wins. Yatsu tries some dirtier tactics, including a knee lift and a throat thrust, and a power slam finishes this for Yatsu at 3:30. WTF? 2 minutes of that was stalling! I don't think I've ever seen a Vachon job out that fast. DUD



Armand Hussien doesn't sweat Kamala, and Tora Yatsu is ready for him. Lord, that match is going to be the shits. And that's shits plural for you kids out there. That makes it bad, as opposed to the shit.



Chris Adams v. The Mongol. Oh, the Mongol. The low card in the poker hand that is Devastation, Inc. He jumps Adams to start with the dreaded CLUBBING FOREARMS, then settles into a front facelock. Snapmare, but Adams reverses into a hammerlock and works the arm with some fancy flipping in between. Then they do the exact same sequence over again. Meh. Marc Lowrance makes the funny of the night, climing that the Mongol is the warrior that Devastation, Inc. sends out to win matches. Right. Mongol takes over with his earth shattering offense of elbows and forearms, then settles in with another facelock, but Adams reverses again. Shoulderblock sequence and both guys go down, with Adams going to the floor. Mongol sends Adams into the turnbuckle, but he goes out After Adams and gets some kicks and a tope suicida for his troubles. Superkick for Mongol not once, but twice, and the Mongol is trapped in the ropes. Adams charges, however, and gets tied up in the ropes himself. The Mongol unleashes some fearsome choking, won't break, and gets DQ'd at 6:52. Fine on Adams end, but the Mongol was a lump. *3/4

"Gorgeous" Jimmy Garvin v. Johnny Mantel. I'll never know why Vince didn't pick Garvin up, because the character and his charisma were incredible considering this is 1983. Jimmy wants David von Erich anytime, in any kind of match. Can he take Mantel's place? Mantel goes for the legs a few times, but gets hammered in the corner for his insolence. Garvin with a few dropkicks, then a sweet flying headscissors into the rest hold, as Jimmy tells the camera how good he is. Note to all the kids who don't know their wrestling history: what WCCW was doing in the early 80's made Vince's show look like it came out of the 19th Century. WWE is still using the setup World Class invented today, just with more expensive cameras. Mantel fights out of the headscissors, fires back with his own dropkicks, then settles into an armbar. Jimmy only tolerates that for a few seconds, then gets bored and drops some knees on Mantel's head. HE'S GARVIN-ING UP!!! Nah, just a slam and another armbar. Lots of armbars in the early 80's. Lots. Mantel reverses the hold into a slam, and it's his turn again to slap on an armbar. Hoo, so many armbars. Heel Mick Foley would be proud. Garvin gets out of the hold, nails Mantel with some knees, but a slam into the turnbuckle gets nothing as Johnny Mantell makes the SUPER BABYFACE COMEBACK! That consists of a few forearms, as Johnny runs the ropes, gets caught trying to execute a cross body block, and Garvin turns it into a side backbreaker for the three count at 6:33. What, no brain buster finish? Too short to be much, but Jimmy Garvin's charisma carries this to at least **. Jimmy looks for that coward David von Erich as we go to break.

Video package for Kevin von Erich. Again, just revolutionary stuff, and something WWE is going back to these days to get their talent over (gotta try something...)

American Heavyweight Championship Match: Kevin von Erich v. Terry Gordy. Man, I miss Terry Gordy. The guys feel each other out at first, doing some classic reversal sequences, as the girls orgasm for Kevin's every move. Headlock takedown by Kevin, and Terry tries to roll through into a pin a few times. But as they say in Bronson, MO "No dice." Shoulderblock and hiptoss by Kevin, and he starts to work the arm. So much arm working. Sooooooo muuuuuuch. Kevin shifts to a body scissors, but Terry decides that punching might break the hold. Well, what do you know? Kevin gets tossed into a few corners, but when Terry goes after him, Kevin hooks him in a standing body scissors in a pretty cool spot. Remind me why Kevin von Erich stayed in Texas, and drug-addled one-footed Kerry von Erich is listed as an IC Champion? A sunset flip by Kevin gets two, but Terry pops him with some elbows. Irish whip turns into a von Erich abdominal stretch, but Terry rolls Kevin across his back to break it. Kevin nails Terry in the corner a few times, then signals for the dreaded Iron Claw. Terry blocks after an epic struggle, and tags Kevin with a few right hands for trying to use such a lame submission hold. Really, both Vince and Bill Watts shit on the Mandible Claw at first ("why couldn't I just bite your fingers off?") yet the Iron f*&%ing Claw is a realistic match-ender? Anyway, Terry throws Kevin to the ropes, but misses an elbow and Kevin is able to slap on a sleeper hold. Terry gets his foot on the ropes for the break, and now he puts Kevin in a sleeper, as the crowd reaction builds to an incredible decibel. Kevin breaks with an elbow, then rams Terry into some turnbuckles. But as with Samoan wrestlers, you don't go after Terry Gordy in the head, and Gordy chokes Kevin on the ropes to remind him. Kevin with shots to the gut, but Terry counters with a knee. They trade dominance for a few seconds as I'm stunned at how good the ebb and flow of this match is. No wonder it carried the territory single-handedly. Suplex by Terry gets two, then he attempts the piledriver a few times, as they do another epic struggle spot. Terry misses Kevin's trademark backwards splash, but Kevin doesn't, and he gets the three count at 12:26. Awesome psychology with some awesome workers. ***1/4.

Mark Lowrance and Kevin von Erich in a post-game recap, talking about Kevin's upcoming match with Ric Flair, and a six-man with the Freebirds.

Back in studio with Michael Hayes and Kevin von Erich. They put over WCCW innovating the video package concept, and Kevin admits that Fritz of all people came up with the idea. Michael with a dig at the legendary von Erich stiff working style, and we're out.

While the wrestling wasn't all that epic, this was a great, quick-paced show with tight focus on all the major angles of the territory at the time. ECW could learn something from WCCW.

Did Bill Richardson Get a Raw Deal?

It was a bold move. Barack Obama and Hillary Clinton were running neck and neck for the Democratic presidential nomination. Every vote of support from fellow Democratic leaders mattered. He had close ties to the Clinton administration. He had developed a friendship with the former President and First Lady. Hell, he even went to Bill Clinton's superbowl party.

Then Bill Richardson went and threw his support behind Barack Obama.

In the days that followed, Richardson made the 24 hour news show rounds. He talked about how it was a tough decision, how tense his phone calls to Bill and Hillary were, and how he hoped the friendships he had fostered over the past 20 years would not be damaged. Most of us watching at home were thinking, "If Obama wins, Bill Richardson is in for a great big 'Thank You' gift."

Then Obama did win, and the speculation began flying: Where would a man with an impressive resume like Bill Richardson fit into an Obama administration? Secretary of the Treasury? Secretary of Homeland Security? No, no. His work as U.N. Ambassador and his Nobel Prize nomination for negotiating hostage release pointed to only one prize.

Secretary of State? Nope, apparently Secretary of Commerce.

Did Bill Richardson get hosed? A lot of people seem to think so, but let's break this down. First of all, Obama doesn't want to fall into the Bush trap of rewarding loyalty for loyalty's sake. Putting people who worked on your campaign (or even just random friends) into positions of governmental power as a payoff is what fostered our current environment of cronyism in the first place. This isn't to say tha Bill Richardson isn't qualified. He certainly was my first pick. But Obama is too savvy a politician to waste his honeymoon period with the electorate by obviously favoring the people who aided him and snubbing the people who opposed him.

Secondly, Hillary Clinton is very qualified for the position. I don't like the fact that she decided to make video games her "this is what's wrong with our kids" pet project, and the way she let her campaign run amok was positively shameful, but let's look at her qualities as a politician: Smart, tough, savvy, and perhaps most importantly, the Clinton brand name. Meeting with foriegn heads of state means confronting a lot of big egos, and big ego is something Hillary has vast amounts of experience handling. Both Hillary and Richardson are competely capable for the task, so we then look at what makes the bigger statement: Hillary as SoS says about Obama "I'm willing to mend fences and make compromises to ensure the right person gets the job." Bill Richardson as SoS says "I reward those who have been with me from the beginning." Since Obama built the majority of his campaign on his ability to be a bridge-builder, Hillary makes a lot more sense as a message.

And let's remember what the Commerce Secretary actually does. He is the government liason for business and industry. With the American economy in the crapper, Richardson has the tough, but potentially very rewarding job of guiding government and business on a course to right the ship of commerce and getr us back on our feet. If Obama is going to propose a "New" New Deal, Richardson will be a major factor there. And if it succeeds, Richardson will also recieve a great deal of credit. Don't forget, the vast majority of the electorate was concerned with domestic issues when they walked into the voting booth on November 4th. The recent attacks in Mumbai have brought foreign issues back into the American conciousness, but most people in this country are still more concerned with keeping their jobs through the end of 2008. If Bill Richardson can forge a concerted coalition between government, business, and industry to climb out of the economic hole we find ourselves in, the position of Commerce Secretary could be a bigger starmaker than SoS.

Yes folks, Bill Richardson will be just fine. And for those of you who still are upset about his "snubbin'", take heart in the fact that there's a possibility Hillary won't want to serve 8 years. After all, Condi Rice took over after Colin Powell left (hmmm, bad example). Besides, Bill Richardson already has impressive foreign policy credentials. The gig as Commerce Secretary adds a new demension to his domestic experience, and makes him an even more viable candidate for President after Obama. Beacuse I've got to tell you folks, unless some brilliant young Democratic superstar comes out of the woodwork, I think you're looking at candidate Richardson in 2016.

Code Monkeys

Ah, Space Ghost Coast to Coast. At a time when other than The Simpsons, the closest this country got to an "adult cartoon" was lame pop-culture references in Animaniacs, the brain trust at Cartoon Network figured out that reusing cheap animation along with a bizarrely fresh (and often edgy) script could result in an American animation revolution. Space Ghost C2C was, in the beginning, nothing short of genius. Not only was the show itself wonderful, but it gave us Adult Swim, an onslaught of programming that spanned the gamut of brilliance (Robot Chicken, Harvey Birdman) to the "quality depends on how much pot was smoked while writing the script" (Aqua Teen Hunger Force, Frisky Dingo) to the simply unwatchable (anybody ever seen an episode of Tom Goes to the Mayor?).

But it all began with Space Ghost, and the invention of a new genre: Cheap animated programming targeting men who were boys in the 1980's and grew up with GI Joe, Transformers, and Nintendo. And in that vein, the G4 network has given us Code Monkeys.

The concept is simple enough, and hardly new. Dave and Jerry are programmers at video game publisher GameAvision, headlining a cast of bizarre characters where wackiness ensues. But the premise and plots aren't important. What makes Code Monkeys fascinating is that the animation is stylized to look like a crappy 8-bit NES game. There are video game in-jokes aplenty, enough for any nerd of my generation to have a few belly laughs. But the best thing about the show is it's the first since The Simpsons to be a true "freeze frame" show. Given the video game nature of the style, every episode has multiple "menu bars" where tangential jokes are taking place, constantly supplementing the plot. It's a brilliant concept that guarantees Code Monkeys needs multiple viewings to get everything contained in each episode.

I wouldn't recommend the show for anyone who doesn't have a VCR or DVR, as it's on an obscure network at ungodly hours (and I can't do appointment viewing when the appointment is at 1:30am), but if you can record it, Code Monkeys is worth a look. Some of the jokes flop, and it has a certain South Park "we're doing this to be outrageous, not because we really have anything to say" quality to it, but the style is so incredibly innovative, you just might get sucked in. That, and it's funny to see the commercials as well. Ever wonder what advertisers think will appeal to 30-something men who watch G4...?

Thankful That I DON'T Have Xbox Live

After a wonderful holiday at my in-laws, consisting of great food, good conversation, and mediocre football, I take stock of what I have to be thankful for. It's a lot, quite frankly. I'm thankful that my wife and TBA son are healthy. I'm thankful that President John McCain isn't going to happen. I'm thankful that I'm sitting at home with a cup of coffee, not running around looking for holiday deals and raising my blood pressure. I'm very thankful to be starting a new job soon. But what I'm most thankful for at this particular moment is that I don't have Xbox Live.

Let's be clear: I'm a member of the video game generation. All you kids out there who enjoy the most sophisticated electronic gaming systems ever seen? Next time you see a 30-something guy on the street, take time out to thank him. If it weren't for my generation freaking out about Super Mario Bros., Zelda, Mega Man, and of course, that amazing Nintendo Entertainment System sitting under the Christmas tree in the 1980's, gaming would have died with Atari and you'd all still be playing with Pogs to pass the time.

As I've gotten older and responsibilities have mounted in my life, my time to devote to one of my favorite hobbies has diminished greatly. I also realize that once Max gets here, my gaming time will practically vanish. And I'm okay with that. I still sneak some time to bust out some Wii or DS here and there, but what was my obsession a decade earlier just isn't feasible in the here and now. My days of blowing off astronomy class at UCSC in favor of playing Final Fantasy VII all day (f*&%ing Ruby Weapon...) have been replaced with getting an hour of Super Smash Bros. Brawl in while my wife is at prenatal yoga.

If I were rich and never had to work again, I would make sure I had a lot more gaming time, but all the gaming time in the world would not make me get Xbox Live. In the most recent issue to EGM, there is a hysterical article about the "Top 10 Things We've Learned About Ourselves from Xbox Live". It seems that the XBL experience consists of 12 year olds you've never met talking smack over a headset, while screaming at their mothers to bring them drinks while they sneakily frag you in Halo 3.

How on earth is this supposed to entice me? When I was younger, I loved getting together with my friends for some friendly competition, be it Street Fighter II, Mario Kart, or Dragon Ball Z. And you know what? I can still get together with my friends for a little Guitar Hero or Mario Party, and still have a good time. There's a healthy level of competition, and everybody wants to win. There may even be a little trash talking that takes place. But the important thing is that when the night is over, we've all had a good time.

I can't grasp the joy there is in a wifi battle for supremacy with a group of people you've never even met. At least at competitive gaming events, everybody is in the same place, and you can actually see the person you're playing against. The concept of playing against some teenager I don't know who doesn't have any responsibilities so he can devote his time to mastering the latest version of Call of Duty isn't appealing in the least. Not only are you going to lose to him, but he'll insult you in that simplistic manner that once you graduated from high school, you were guaranteed not to have to put up with anymore. And all of this in a faux-slang accent that he picked up from his 50 Cent albums, even though he really grew up on the mean streets of Dixon, TN. I was supposed to be able to leave that behind in high school as well, DJ Jazzy Trevor.

And if you do beat him? What joy is there in crushing a child? Who are you going to brag to? You Mom? In my case, my wife? Neither of them are going to be terribly impressed, I can tell you.

Yes, I'm becoming an old fuddy-duddy. My gaming skills are diminishing, and it's a little sad. I remember being much more adept at Super Mario Bros. than my poor Dad, and I'm sure a little part of me will die when I'm playing the third iteration of the Wii with Max and he totally schools my ass. But the madness of XBL and Playstation Network is indicative of a major problem we have in this country. We Americans have a tendency to take great ideas, and blow them out of proportion to a level of largess and excess that becomes ridiculous. Trading insults over a group game of Halo isn't social interaction; It's mocking an abstract concept of another human being. Gaming parties are awesome, and I'll have them as long as I can. But battling people I'll never know for a position of gaming supremacy? Pass.

Thoughts on Survivor Series

A quick note. As my wife and I rapidly approach parenthood, getting ready for Max to enter the world coupled with a (possible) new job leaves me with precious little time to devote to my blog posts. In other words, since I don't get paid for it, I don't have hours on end to provide a blow-by-blow analysis of every wrestling show and PPV. When I can go into great detail, I will. But the foreseeable future contains quick reaction pieces like this.

All in all, a great show, one of the better WWE has produced this year. Most amazing to me was that the worst moment of the show lead to the best moment of the show (more on that in a bit).

The opening elimination match had a brisk pace (did it really go about 30 minutes?) good action, and hit all the right notes for all the right feuds. I continue to be bewildered by the burial of MVP (was the Wellness tech he mocked backstage Johnny Ace's Mom?), and I hope we haven't seen the end of Michaels v. Morrison, but it was a solid opener that got the crowd hot. I loved the "outsmart" him spot that lead to JBL's elimination, and with two bad knees, Rey looked better than he has since his return. ***1/4.

The women's match wasn't terrible. Blown spots aplenty to be sure, but they all had clear characters, clear journeys, and the real women's champion won. I'm not the biggest Michelle McCool fan, and I still contend her spot is entirely predicated on her willingness to nail the Undertaker, but she is improving, as is the women's division as a whole (albiet very slowly). That's more than I can say for TNA's ladies. * 1/2.

The casket match. Of the many, many Undertaker/Big Show feuds, this has been the most enjoyable. I'm usually irritated with Poochietaker, but it is astounding that as he gets older, he gets better in the ring. The match had great big spots, didn't go to long, and a pretty cool finish with Show going into the coffin, the coffin falling over, and the lid slamming shut. pretty enjoyable stuff. **3/4.

Team Batista v. Team Orton. Why Bill Regal got a quick exit for the flu while Matt Hardy had to work for 20 minutes with a bad knee I'll never know, but once again a fun, well-paced match. Most of the guys got to shine here, and maybe we'll get a C.M. Punk Intercontinental title reign out of it. I was intrigued that Cody Rhodes got to survive as Orton's modus operandi for this PPV is solo survival, but I suppose it's another stop along the road that leads to Randy being the boss of the Priceless kids. Again, good storytelling. ***.

HHH v. Vladamir Koslov. Ahhh, candidate for worst PPV match of the year not involving Cute Kip. This was atrocious on many levels, and my best friend and I are in agreement that HHH purposefully called that kind of match to highlight how limited Koslov is and end his push once and for all. Craptacular on all levels until the RETURN OF "MACHO MAN" EDGE SAVAGE!!! And his beard!!! No, not Vicky. I was ticked for a moment about the Hardy bait-and-switch, but then I realized this will most likely lead to a four-way at Armageddon, so I'm fine with three of those guys carrying the workload (guess which three?). The match itself was -**, but the last minute was *****.

Jericho v. Cena. Great return for Cena. He got the majority of cheers for once! Interesting psychology, and the crowd was with them all the way. Compare the buzz of the fans for this against the utter silence of HHH/Koslov. Jericho working the neck was good stuff, especially the old school Walls of Jericho while digging the knee into the neck. Great moment, I'm just sorry the Jericho title run ended so soon. But hey, I said the same thing after Cyber Sunday and look how that turned out. ***3/4.

And let's not forget the star of the night: The commentary. All six guys were hysterical, and it was such a nice change from the usual vitriol and on-air feuding we get when six announcers get together. What I really want after listening to last night's show is a announce team of Matt Striker and Jim Ross.

In short, the 22nd Survivor Series was similar to this year's No Mercy: a much better show in execution than it was on paper (though not nearly as good as NM was). The only terrible thing on the show was salvaged at the end, and some fine wrestling was exhibited. It had a definite throwback feel, and a great moment for Cena to close out the show. Get the replay if you haven't seen the show yet.

Smackdown Review 11-21-08

Go home show for Survivor Series!

R-Truth and Matt Hardy v. Shelton Benjamin and Mark Henry. Why is Matt still working when he's hurt as badly as he is? Anybody else from his team could have filled this slot. Shelton and Truth in a slugfest to start, which Truth wins, then takes Benjamin down with an elbow. Hardy in, and a double elbow gets one on the U.S. champ. Hardy and Truth work the arm, but Shelton fights up and gets a heavily edited possibly double-sledge on Truth to take over. It gets two, and Shelton hits the chinlock. Truth nails him in the abdomen with some elbows, then a dropkick leads to the two count. Hardy back in, Benjamin gets tossed, and we go to break.

Back in with Matt still working the arm. Benjamin fights back, but it gets nowhere as Hardy nails him with some more elbows. Matt calls for the Twist of Fate, but gets pushed off into Henry's waiting fist, and Shelton gets two off of that. Matt having a bad knee really shows, as he's totally changed his style, and not for the better. Henry in, and the big man offense begins. Matt with some weak punches to the gut leads to a headbutt and throat stomp by Henry, and Benjamin is back in. Right hand by Shelton into a modified Camel Clutch gets him two, and Henry tags back in. Punch/kick/stomp/bodyslam leads to another two count. Matt ducks a clothesline and Jesus god, we get a bearhug. It doesn't last long, though, as Henry dumps Matt back-first into the turnbuckle. He tries it again, but Hardy goes for a sunset flip, leading to the "big man tries to squash the little guy, but little guy gets out of the way" spot. Benjamin and Truth tag in, and R-Truth is A HOUSE AFIRE! Breakdance dodge, spin kick, and flapjack DDT leads to a pin attempt, which Henry breaks up. Truth dances a little too much and falls victim to a Samoan drop. Henry tries to get in for some reason, so Matt retaliates with a baseball slide to the knees that knocks Henry off the apron. Splash by Matt onto Henry from the outside, while Benjamin misses a Real Estate Steve splash, R-Truth hits the corkscrew elbow, and an ax kick ends this with three. Hammered home Survivor Series, but with Matt being injured and Henry being Henry, this gets *3/4.

Same Cena package we got on Raw.

HHH is backstage with Eve Torres. HHH is channeling DX Hunter, doing a goofy bit about Eves' breasts, when he's really talking about her pearl necklace. DROLL. Anyway, Jeff Hardy and Vladimir Koslov think they're the best, but he knows he's the best. Speak of the devil, Ivan Drago himself joins us for no point, really. HHH makes another "funny" and we're off...

...to even MORE bad comedy, as it's a sketch between Maria and Festus! Festus is a great listener, apparently. Luckily for me, Miz and Morrison show up to save the segment, playing every jock douchebag you ever knew in high school. Good stuff.

The Miz and John Morrison v. Jesse and Festus. I get the feeling Jesse is going to have a very Owen Hart-esque career. He's good and works hard, but won't be appreciated for his abilities. Let's hope he gets a different end to his career, as well. Bell rings and Festus goes nuts. Morrison attacks from behind and gets a boot, but Festus responds with an Appalachian uppercut. Punches in the corner, and Jesse is in. Clothesline misses, and Morrison knocks Jesse down with a springboard spin kick. Miz is in with a clothesline in the corner and an elbow to the back of the head. Chinlock city, but a suplex is deflected and Festus gets the tag. Butt splash in the corner and flying shoulderblock knock Miz down, and Morrison gets a punch on the apron just because. Bicycle kick on Miz, but Morrison rings the bell and Festus of course goes limp. Jesse gets tossed by Miz, and the Reality Check on the comatose Festus ends this. Good storytelling, mediocre wrestling. Call it *1/2. Jesse gets the Moonlight Drive as a bonus, and WWE's best tag team take the ring bell with them as future insurance. For some reason, they ring it once more, Festus gets crazy again, and chases them to the back.

Jeff Hardy v. Triple H. If Hardy wins, he gets added to the title match at Survivor Series. Crazy Evil Dark Jeff feigns a handshake, and turns it into kicks and punches in the corner. Irish whip into a hurricanrana, and HHH bails. Jeff hits a flying clothesline on the outside and tosses HHH back in, who runs the ropes but gets caught in a double-leg takedown and groin legdrop by Jeff. Sitting dropkick leads to two. I like Jeff's psychology here. Pendulum legrop in the corner misses, but a Pedigree attempt by HHH gets turned into a slingshot to the post and a Russian legsweep. HHH dodges a flying bodypress, and Jeff falls to the outside as we go to break.

We're back with HHH in control. A couple of corner whips get two for HHH, as does a backbreaker. Jeff fights back, but gets nailed with a lariat for another two. Abdominal stretch time, as Jeff again fights out, but puts his head down for the high knee and another two count. Jawbreaker counter by Jeff, and both guys are down. HHH gets the spinebuster, and the fans boo! Pedigree is countered by a backdrop, and Jeff tags HHH with a version of the Whisper in the Wind. He hits another one for a count of two. Punches for HHH, and a neckbreaker gets another two. The crowd is in favor of Hardy, but he's not getting the pop for his comeback I would have thought I'd hear. Of course, this has been edited, so what am I really hearing? Anyway, another two for Jeff, as he gets frustrated and tosses HHH. Jeff follows him out, and slams his head on the announce table. Jeff back in the ring with a legdrop, and again gets two. Twist of Fate doesn't connect, but a front facelock suplex does, and Jeff goes to the top. Swanton Bomb misses, and Vladimir joins us. HHH punches him off the apron, and Jeff lays him out with a tope. HHH tries to suplex Hardy back in, but Jeff turns it into a rollup and gets the three! ***1/4. Great match, especially for a TV match. Jeff and HHH shake, but both get taken out by Koslov. He works HHH's ribs in the corner and Jeff tries to fight him off, getting a fall away slam for his effort. HHH goes for a comeback, but a headbutt ends that pretty quickly. Great build for what hopefully won't be a stinker of a match.

Ezekiel Jackson and THE Brian Kendrick get hassled by some loser backstage, and deal with it appropriately. I love these guys.

The Colon Brothers v. THE Brian Kendrick and Ezekiel Jackson. This is non-title. Shane Helms joins us for his weekly douchebag comment, and I'm looking forward to his return. Primo and Kendrick to start, and Primo gets some punches in the corner. Primo has some choice words for Big Zeke and Kendrick takes advantage, but Primo fights back. I get a kick out of Primo's 70's babyface style, simply because no one else does it. Carlito comes in with some kicks in the corner, an elbow, and Kendrick tags in Big Zeke. A flurry of punches and a kick go poorly for Carlito, as Zeke just shoulderblocks him down. Big bodyslam and THE Brian Kendrick is back in with some brutal looking knees. Carlito with a knee of his own, and Primo is back in. He nails both heels, and Kendrick gets a flying elbow, a dropkick, and a monkey flip with extra monkeys. Irish whip leads to a badly botched flapjack, but they turn it into back suplex instead, which gets two until Zeke saves. That was pretty innovative. Zeke tosses Carlito, drags Kendrick to the corner, then legally tags him. Awesome. Uranage slam gets Zeke the pin to set up a future tag title shot. **. I could really get to like this tandem.

Kizarny is coming. Maybe his manager can be Kay Fabe.

MVP v. James Mason. MVP gives Mason a chance to leave in a nice little spot. MVP takes Mason down and rides him into a pinning sequence for a one count. Drive By kick is interrupted by Khali, and Mason gets the surprise roll up. DUD. This feud is stupid beyond words.

The Bella Twins v. Victoria and Natalya. Nikki Bella and Victoria start. Victoria wins a test of strength, and a standing wristlock sequence leads to some nice acrobatics by Nikki. Brie tags in to help execute a pointless double-team move (seriously, I have no idea what it was supposed to accomplish, much less how to call it), but whatever it was, it gets a two count. Victoria powers Brie into her corner and Natalya is in. Natalya drags Brie's throat across the rope, and they trade slaps, leading to a sunset flip pin attempt by Brie that gets one. Firewoman's carry and Nikki is back in for more pointless acrobatics before tagging Brie again. Brie runs the ropes, but gets kicked in the head by Victoria, pissed due to her credibility evaporating from having to carry the Bella twins. Nikki runs in and attacks Victoria, leading to the ref breaking it up and Natalya running Brie into Victoria's boot. Tag, and Victoria hits Arachnaphobia for two. Brie tags Nikki, who bumps Natalya and gives Victoria a couple of dropkicks, a monkey flip, and a corner clothesline. Victoria is able to hit the Widow's Peak, but Brie stops the count. The twins do the switch behind the ref's back, and get the pin to ends this. 3/4*. Still not as bad as the TNA women's tag match this week.

Time for the Undertaker show. Oh, joy. Usual Mark Calloway promo, although he sounds a little horse tonight. Taker is actually a little too attached to the giant casket, reminding me of Gollum and his Precious. Big Show interrupts before I fall asleep, accompanied by the Human Heat Magnet, Vicky Guerrero. Show's not scared, mister! He believes in the power of his fist. Taker than uses his magic powers to turn out the lights, and when they come back on, he's got Vicky by the throat! Into the casket for Vicky, as Chavo tries to save and gets slaughtered. While Taker works Chavo in the corner, Show rescues Vicky, so Taker tombstone's Chavo and he goes into the casket. And we're out.

Well, we got another great HHH-Jeff Hardy match, and the show built Survivor Series pretty well. The problem is I don't know if the matches they've built are worth while. We'll see on Sunday I suppose...

TNA Review 11-20-08

We begin tonight with the Main Event Mafia. And hey! Real Estate Steve is making a rare appearence when the group is acting like heels! Who knew? They come out with a coffin, and Angle says they are there to give Christian Cage a proper burial. I love shoot comments that aren't supposed to be shoot comments. Angle then blows it by once again bringing up the rumor that Christian might be going back to WWE. See, to the rabid pro-TNA fans in attendance, that makes Christian the heel, and the MEM the faces. Which the fuck is it, Russo? Angle asks if anyone has any final words, and Rhino shows up. Rhino complains that problems with Christian's decisions should have been taken up in the back. Oh christ, here we go again. Everything you see out here is fake, except for what's happening right now. This is a SHOOT, brother! Big Graybeard talks some trash, and Rhino responds by calling the MEM egomaniacs and saying he connects more with the TNA Originals. The MEM are also a bunch of *&^%$, especially Booker T. Ohhh, Idi Amin did not like that one! Speaking of which, Booker drops the Idi Amin accent when he yells at Rhino. Is it because he's mad, or because it's hard to take someone in a main event storyline seriously when they speak in such a goofy way, and he finally wised up? Anyway, Rhino stupidly charges in and gets a beatdown for his trouble, and Booker lays him out with the Legends title, busting him open. Rhino gets tossed in the casket as Jeff Jarrett, Mick Foley, and Jeremey Borash watch from the back. Mick has never seen anything like this. Not D-X. Not the nWo. Yeah, those groups drew money. Jarrett reiterates that he's not fighting Kurt Angle, no way no how buster! Jeff tells Mick to hype the main event for Final Resolution tonight, no matter what Kurt Angle does. At least I'm gonna get a Mick Foley promo out of this show.

Back from break, and Joe and Styles are arguing with the Machine Guns. Mick shows up and makes a match between the two teams TONIGHT! while knocking Alex Shelley. I hope this slow turn means something for Shelley. His work as Jeff Jarrett's flunky a few years ago was nothing short of brilliant. Chris Sabin's pouty-face is pretty awesome, too. Mick paraphrases Nathan Hale, and teases more dressing down for Alex in the future.

Sonjay Dutt (with SoCal Val) and Hiroshi Tanahashi v. Consequences Creed and Jay Lethal. Double team by the heels to start, but Creed trips Tanahashi as he goes to the ropes and pulls him out. Springboard back elbow by Lethal on Dutt, but Val taunts her former lover, and that leads to a snapmare and mounted punches for Sonjay. Tanahashi tags in, which leads to a pretty slick sitting dropkick/360 splash legdrop combo by the heels which gets two. Attempted backdrop turns into a Lethal dropkick, and Creed and Dutt tag in. Punches and kicks for both heels until Dutt hits a jawbreaker to stop Creed. Considering the lukewarm (at best) response that Creed gets, he needs to take more than just the last name of Carl Weathers' character, he needs to be the arrogant jerk that Apollo Creed was. That's what made him a compelling character. You don't call yourself Creed, then act like Balboa. Dutt gets some minor offense in, but a springboard gets turned into a Creed TKO for the three-count. Considering the talent, these guys should have had a lot more time, but fun and fast paced for a TV match. *3/4.

The Beautiful People, epitome of a great gimmick that never pays off in the ring, join us from their palacial estate backstage. They don't know what a Sojourner Bolt is. Join the club, ladies. Hope it has more charisma than a Taylor Wilde. The BP wax philosophic on what life must have been like for Sojourner in school. They then turn to Christy Hemme, as Angelina Love points out a wrestling ring is not a strip club. Don't bury your own gimmick, Angie!

Who is Suicide? The only guy who bought the TNA videogame, probably.

We get a video hyping the return of Feast of Fired. As long as it isn't as horribly convoluted as last time, fine. You know, the only reason the Money in the Bank briefcase ever changes hands is because guys get injured, not to swerve the audience.

Jim Cornette, pointless authority figure now that Foley and Jarrett are on the show, is in his office with Eric Young, Shane Sewell, and Shiek Abdhul Bashir. Cornette says Sewell's wrestling days are over, that he never made it in this country, and he has to deal with that. The X-Division title is returned to Bashir, Sewell is put on probation and can't touch anybody, and Young gets a shot at the Legends title tonight. Nothing like a reverse Danny Davis storyline to electrify the crowd.

The Beautiful People (with Cute Kip) v. Sojourner Bolt and Christy Hemme. Mike Tenay continues to hype the Sarah Palin bullshit. This is why you have less credibility than Don West, "Professor". Bolt and Love start out, and Bolt immediately looks lost out there. Shoulderblock is met with a bicycle kick and mounted punches by Love. Velvet Sky tags in for a double elbow and a two count. Sky draws Christy Hemme in while Love chokes out Bolt, as I wonder how this could possibly be worse than Kelly Kelly v. Victoria on Raw Monday. At least that only went two minutes. Cross-body for Bolt gets two, and Velvet goes after the leg. Stun-gun by Bolt as Tenay and West won't shut up about Sarah Palin. Most people see you as the joke promotion guys. Is talking about the joke candidate really the best way to change that perception? 9 times out of 10, Vince only hypes celebrity appearences that have a chance of actually happening. Lukewarm tag to Hemme leads to a clothesline on Love, screaming, Trish Stratus' old Matrix dodge, and a slap for Kip (earn your pay, Monty!). Light's Out by Angelina off the distraction ends this monstrosity. 1/4*. I have never seen a division fall apart so fast once you remove the keystone (Gail Kim).

LAX Rough Cut. This week we're looking at Homicide. Crazy story about getting shot in the leg before a match, so he stuck a tampon in the wound and held it there with duct tape. I like these vignettes, I just wish they would lead to a push for the guys who get them.

The debut of "ODB's Angle". As dumb as it seems, it can't possibly be worse than "Karen's Angle". Sharmel is the guest, and her facials are fabulous. I think Sharmel is one of the most underrated performer's in wrestling, period. She plays heel and face so well, and it is especially hard for a woman to play face in this day and age. She's simply amazing. Okay segment with some funny stuff ("Squirt some lime juice on it, it'll be fine.") and they eventually start arguing about the MEM, leading to Sharmel v. ODB at Final Resolution. Bam!

Why are we doing a rundown of the card FORTY-FIVE MINUTES INTO THE SHOW?

JB with the MEM. Booker wearing jeans while everyone else is in full suits makes him look like a chump. Kurt has some demands for Final Resolution: He wants Jeff Jarrett, and four TNA Scrubs against Steiner, Nash, Booker, and Real Estate Steve. Booker's got to work by himself against four guys?! That hardly seems fair. Why Angle doesn't have the title when he's obviously the leader boggles my mind.

The Motor City Machine Guns v. Samoa Joe and A.J. Styles. Four man brawl to start. Great bit as Joe thows Shelley outside, goes for a tope suicida, but Alex dodges and mule kicks Joe when he turns around. Sabin with his own suicide dive under Shelley's legs, but A.J. knocks Shelley off the apron and wipes both guys out. See, this is why the TNA Originals should be the faces, Russo: They consist of guys who can have these kinds of matches, at the MEM have Scott Steiner and Kevin Nash.

Back from break, as Joe is elbowing Shelley, but Sabin hits him from behind with a flying dropkick. Right hand by Shelley and Sabin tags in, leading double gut shots, double kneecapping, and double side kicks. Sabin poses for us, and shows A.J. how to find his hometown on his hand. I love that taunt. Joe fights back with chops aplenty, but catches a boot in the corner. A Sabin dive is deflected, however, and he gets powerslammed for his troubles. Shelley and Styles both tag in, and A.J. scores with a drop kick. Flying forearm gets two, and A.J. sets up for the Style's Clash, but gets nailed by a Sabin spin kick. Shelley goes for Sliced Bread II, but Joe just destroys him and sends him outside. Sabin retaliates with a flying clothsline on Joe. A.J. hits Sabin with a boot and a chop, but Sabin goes low and the Guns are in control. Cradle Shock is deflected, and Styles gets the Pele Kick on Sabin. Joe kills Sabin with a lariat, Styles Clash for Shelley, and that is all. Short, but fast paced and action all the way. ***. The MEM run in (well, Booker and Angle run. Big Graybeard kind of lumbers in at his leasure) and beat down Joe and Styles while Steiner and Real Estate Steve join us on the outside. Consequences Creed and Jay Lethal try to help, but when know how that turns out.

Raisha Saeed, Awesome Kong, and Raka Kahn are in Traci Brooks office (who's even more useless than Jim Cornette now) demanding new opponents. It seems if Kong has no victims, there will be dire consequences. We'll have to see Kahn wrestle? It's scary how much Traci Brooks is rocking the old school Chyna look.

In the locker room of the TNA Scrubs, Rhino is pissed. TNA is a lot like ECW, it seems, and he's fought this fight before. If they'll fight like men, dammit, he'll die for them, dammit. Too many "dammits", but easily the best promo Rhino's had in 10 years.

Legends Chapionship: Booker T. v. Eric Young.I kinda miss Eric Young not being scared by his own pyro. At least when he was a coward, he was allowed to have a personality. I'm not sure I buy "plucky house afire babyface" Eric Young. Lockup to start, and we get a wonderfully magnanmous break from Book. Hammerlock on Young is reversed, and Booker makes the ropes. Booker pretends to want a lockup, but opts for a knee and a chop instead. Corner charge leads to an armdrag and armbar by Young. Booker fights out, but an irish whip leads to the same sequence. Booker fights out again, but misses the side kick and gets punched out by Young. Booker counters by hanging Young on the top rope, and the side kick is sucessful this time. Thrust kick gets two, but Eric fights back. A thumb to the eye stops that, however, and we go to the chinlock. Showtime fights out one more time, and hits an elbow, clothesline, and bodyslam for two. Death valley driver attempt is countered by the Ax Kick, but that misses and a second DVD attempt by Young is sucessful. It only gets two, however. Sharmel distracts Young, Ax Kick, and we're done. Nice to see Eric get a little offense in. **

Back in the office, it seems Kurt isn't going to like what Mick Foley has to say. If it's the main event I think it is, I'm not going to like it, either.

Team 3-D are backstage with JB, and they want Beer Money. Racially akward moment, as it seems now that we have a black President-elect, Ray says D-Von doesn't shut up. Weird. They're also ticked that they haven't been asked to join the MEM. So they're feuding with Beer Money, and that makes them faces, but they want to join the MEM, the top heel group? Or is the MEM the top face group? Fu. Cking. Russo.

I refuse to recap anything involving Hermie Sadler. Next.

Kevin Nash and Kurt Angle v. Matt Morgan and Abyss. Angle and Abyss start, as Kurt tries some fancy wrestling and winds up on the business end of a shoulderblock. Angle takes a walk and confers with Graybeard, then gets all punchy-kicky. Abyss no-sells and hits a lariat, then pounds Angle down in the corner. A Kurt eye-rake gets him nowhere, as Abyss hits the boot, then the Shock Treatment for two. Morgan is in and Kurt targets the knee. That's countered by the Carbon Footprint, and Kurt no-sells another finishing move for two as we go to break.

Back in with Morgan in control, as he bodyslams Kurt and hits an elbow drop for two. Kurt tags in Graybeard, who not surprisingly takes his time. Punching contest is won by Morgan, but Angle clips the knee, because somebody has to work in that ring. Clothesline from Nash gets two. Knees and elbows in the corner, as this match begins to fall apart without Kurt bumping like a madman. Nash continues to move through his amazing moveset with the boot in th corner, and sweet Jesus, Kurt comes back in. Morgan fights back, but Angle attacks the knee again. European uppercuts lead to an Angle Slam attempt, but Morgan counters with a clothesline and both guys are down. Beer Money, the greatest tag team in the business today, joins us at ringside, with James Storm rocking his own beer tray. Hmmm: Chris Harris, part of a great tag team with James Storm, finds out he's bland and boring as a singles wrestler. Robert Roode, bland and boring singles wrestler, until he becomes part of a great tag team with James Storm. Let's all aknowledge who the star of the team is, shall we? Anyway, Abyss tags in and cleans house, then hits a side slam for two, but Angle saves. Abyss throws Angle outside, then starts a fight with Beer Money as Nash and Morgan brawl very slowly in the ring. Abyss tosses Angle back in, but goes to the top, and Storm breaks a bottle over his head. Nash with the boot, goodnight. Meh. *1/2. Lord Graybeard really needs to not wrestle anymore.

Mick joins us in the ring. He recognizes the fact that the MEM are a huge part of wrestling history, a past he himself is a part of. He also thinks the MEM might be the greatest group ever assembled. He thought change was inevitable, but maybe the MEM is the past, present, and future. All he wanted was a level playing field so the young guys could get a fair shake. So he's booked two main events. First: Booker T., Kevin Nash, Scott Steiner, and Real Estate Steve v. Samoa Joe, A.J. Styles and two mystery partners. And what I was dreading rears its ugly head, as the stipulation is if any of the TNA Scrubs gets the fall, A.J. becomes TNA champion. So not only does the champion not have to be involved in the decision, neither does the challenger? Have I mentioned how much I hate Vince Russo? Way to build credibility for your main title, guys. Second main event is Kurt Angle v. Rhino. Kurt is out and he's pissed. He wants to know why Jarrett keeps ducking him. If Kurt can't have Jarrett, he wants Mick Foley, and pops Mick in the face. That draws Jarrett out. He won't let Kurt destroy what he built from the ground up. Jarrett makes the stipulation that if Kurt wins, he gets Jarrett at the next PPV. If Rhino wins, Kurt is fired. Kurt slaps Jeff, Rhino gores Kurt, and we're out.

The focus remains strong on the main storyline, but the retarded stipulations combined with the fact that I don't know who the good guys are keep me from crossing the line. We'll see...

Traumatizing Infants Through Color

My wife and I are expecting our first child very soon, as in sometime in the next 30 days soon. We've been scrambling around trying to make sure we've got everything ready, and doing our best to have the nursery in a decent enough place for his arrival.

One of the nice touches has been the dresser that we're putting in said nursery. This piece of furniture is 65 years old, and was actually my dresser when I was a little guy, too. It has decades of paint caked on it, so my Mom and I have been stripping, sanding, and staining it over the last several days; It's hard to work on a crafts project when you only have an hour to spare each day.

Since our boy's crib is a lovely dark walnut color, we've tried to stain the dresser in a similar , if not exact, color. While working on this, I commented that Max (our soon-to-be boy's name) would have a lot of dark furniture in his room. My Mom spun around to me with such speed that she took me off guard. "For god's sake, make sure he has bright colors in there!" she exclaimed. "You brother had nothing but dark colors and look what happened. You had yellows and bright blues, and you turned out fine."

Worry not. My brother isn't a serial killer or Christian conservative. He did butt heads with my parents a lot, however, and growing up was more often than not a pain in the ass. So heeding this advice, I looked around the nursery the other day, observing the color schemes we have for Max.

Yes, his furniture tends to be dark, but the dark crib has bright blue and orange bedding. His toys and clothes are all out of The Wizard of Oz. Except for that one hat that is black and dark red, but that's because those are the only colors babies can see in the first stage of life outside the womb. At least, that's what my wife tells me. And she's smart (lawyer smart) so I believe her.

The point is this: If my Mother's theory has any validity, and dark colors make you difficult and light colors make you easy, Max has a nice combination of both. Am I setting my son up to be a schizophrenic...?

The Lieberman Fallout

One of the reasons I vote Democratic is because the Dems, more often than not, do things better than the Republicans. You get competent officials instead of cronyism, an attempt to make government better as opposed to trying to kill it off completely, and the never-ending quest to include everybody and make sure we all get a fair shake, whereas the GOP more often than not has an "I've got mine, so go fuck yourself" attitude. Ask Clarence Thomas about that one.

But we're honest here at Life Lessons, and I wouldn't be honest if I didn't admit that the Republican party does some things very well, much better than we soft progressives. Up until the Obama revolution, nobody campaigned like the GOP. They're much more effective at messaging, too. How can a reasoned and detailed argument for green technology compete with "Drill, Baby, Drill" chanted mindlessly ad naseum? And of course, for better or for worse, the Republican party has always been better at party discipline than the Democrats.

Which brings us to Joe Lieberman, recently returned to the party's good graces with no punishment for his crimes (and no, voluntarily stepping down from the environmental sub-committee doesn't count). Immediately, the pundits began talking about how the Democrats needed to pardon Lieberman, how party unity must trump all if President Obama is to get anything done. Punishing Lieberman would drive him into the open arms of the Republicans, widening the gap that much more against the Democratic quest for 60 votes in the Senate.

I disagree. While drumming Lieberman out of the party would be counter-productive, something had to happen this week, or else why bother having parties at all? If Joe Lieberman truly believed that John McCain was the superior candidate, fine. If he campaigned for McCain due to their friendship, that's fine, too. I'll even give you questioning Obama's experience. But to say that wondering if Obama is a Marxist is a good question? To call Obama naive, then aggressively campaign for Sarah Palin, who has proven herself to be legally retarded? To speak at the GOP convention? That's betrayal on the level of Zell Miller, and that kind of betrayal demands consequences.

If this had been the GOP? Forget about it. Lieberman would have been thrown under the bus at a mind-boggling speed. Look at what they did to Chuck Hagel, and he didn't betray the neo-cons anywhere near the degree Lieberman did the Democrats. Limbaugh, Hannity, O'Reily, and the rest of the sycophant right-wing attack dogs would have eaten Lieberman alive.

But we're the Democrats, and we're soft. Soft is good at times, but it also can get in the way of what is right. Lieberman should have been stripped of his Homeland Security charimanship based simply on incompetence. He vowed to get to the bottom of governmental failures in the Katrina response, and we have yet to see any action from him. It has been 3 years since an American city drowned, and no one has been punished. Yes, the hurricane was an act of nature, but the hurricane wasn't what killed Americans. The failed levees are what drowned New Orleans, and people can be held responsible for that. Since Joe Lieberman refuses to hold anyone responsible, we must hold him responsible.

I've heard all the arguments. "Now he owes Obama". Let me ask you something: What if the Democrats called Lieberman's bluff? He said that losing his charimanship was a "deal breaker", but what would really have happened if we took it from him anyway? He's an independent already. Would he really have become a full-blooded member of the GOP? How could the Republicans trust him? It's like being the mistress of a cheating husband who tells you he'll love you forever. What kind of guarantee do you have?

Also, look at Lieberman's approval ratings, and you'll see that over 60% of his constituents disapprove of the job he's doing. He was elected because of his progressive leanings. If he went full neo-conservative, and voted that way just to spite his former party, I promise you he would be out of a job in 2012. Joe Lieberman is a lot of things, but stupid isn't one of them. He also has never been in the game for the Democrats or the Republicans: He's in it for Joe Lieberman. Sure, he would pout about losing his gavel, but he wouldn't betray everything that got him elected in the first place out of revenge.

Finally progressives, we need to give up the pipe dream of a filibuster-proof majority this time around. Right now with two independents caucusing with us, we have a 57-40 majority. We need to run the table on the open Senate seats to get to 60, and it ain't gonna happen. Mark Begich will win Alaska, and Al Franken might beat Norm Coleman, but I don't think Saxby Chambliss is going down. Besides, there are enough moderate Republicans in the Senate, and Obama is a savvy enough politician, that he'll be able to get to 60 on important legislation. Either way, Lieberman would not be a deciding factor.

Joe Lieberman should have been punished not out of revenge, but for the fact that he has not done his job well. He also should have been punished to send a message. If you want to enjoy the spoils of victory, you have to fight for the winning cause. After all, you don't get a piece of the winnings when you bet on the wrong horse.

ECW Review 11-18-08

Yes, I'm doing a recap of ECW, so make your smarmy comments to yourself and let's be on our way. Someone has to do it.

We're joined at the top by WWE's most entertaining tag team since the heyday of Edge and Christian: John Morrison and The Miz. And they immediately embarrass me by giving a lackluster promo that makes fun of their opponents and partners for Survivor Series. I know neither of these guys has the charisma of The Rock, but part of what made Rocky so special was the freedom to do his own material, not recite a canned speech from the writing team. Anyway, they are going to embarrass Shawn Michaels on their way to becoming the greatest two superstars (entertainers, boys!) in WWE history. Miz? No. Morrison? Maybe...

D.J. Gabriel (with Alicia Fox)v. Some Guy. I think this is T.J. Wilson from FCW, but I'm not sure. Matt Striker buries Gabriel right out of the gate by comparing him to that amazing money-drawing machine Alex Wright. Gabriel hits a leg sweep, bodyslam, and elbow, all while dancing in between. Fireman's carry slam into an armbar for Gabriel, as I start to wonder how he has that body in the era of WELLNESS! Speaking of bodies, Alicia needs a new outfit, because the one she has on doesn't flatter, and she really has no other skills at this point besides looking good. Some guy fights back, but gets hit with another legsweep and a European uppercut (because D.J. is European I guess). Flying European Uppercut finishes the match. * for accomplishing what it set out to do: Introduce the new guy. Gabriel and Fox dance as I wonder, looking at his physique, if he was brought up just so they could suspend him ala Harry Smith and Dolph Ziggler.

5 Minute Challenge Match: Jack Swagger v. Tommy Dreamer. As long as Swagger isn't asked to cut another 10 minute promo, we should be fine.We're judging this on points, and Swagger gets 2 by taking down and riding Dreamer. Rinse/repeat and Swagger is up by 4, but Tommy "escapes" (even though Swagger "let him go") and he's on the board, 4-1. Another takedown for 6-1, and I start hoping that I'll get a TNA moment, and this match will be interrupted by soft-core porn. Tommy escapes for 6-2. Is this over yet? No, I have three more minutes? *sigh*. Swagger's arrogance is fun though, and it costs him as he takes his eyes off of Tommy for a takedown and 6-4. Jack is pissed and takes Tommy down for 8-4. Escape point for Dreamer makes it 8-5. Swagger goes down the the ref position, and we all see where this is going as Tommy kicks him in the ribs and hits the DDT for the DQ. DUD.

Ricky Ortiz and Generic Blond Chick #236 are interrupted by an angry Jack Swagger who's looking for Teddy Long. Swagger and Ortiz engage in some horrific trash-talking. Teddy saves the segment and makes Jack Swagger v. Tommy Dreamer in an extreme rules match for next week.

Matt Striker explains the rules of Survivor Series, because when we give up on our adult audience and market to children, that's what we have to do.

Mark Henry, Cody Rhodes, and William Regal v. Kofi Kingston, Finlay, and Matt Hardy. Does it bother anyone else that the tag team champions never wrestle or even talk with each other? Finlay and Regal to start, as I'm finally excited for this show 46 minutes in. Regal does a ridiculous bump off of Finaly's right hand and tags Cody. Finlay tags in Hardy, who gets some right hands and an elbow on Rhodes. Bodyslam for Cody, and Matt nails Mark Henry to draw everybody into the ring as we go to break. Back in, and it's Rhodes and Kingston. Monkeyflip into the corner by Kingston is countered by an elbow, as Regal is brought in to work the arm. Reversal brings in Finlay, and I'm amazed at the exaggerated way Regal sells for him. They continue to reverse each other's offense, as Matt Striker put them on a list of UK greats along with Rollerball Rocco and Marty Jones. Grisham of course has no idea who they are, so he just ignores the comment. Finlay to the top, but gets pushed off by Regal and Rhodes gets tagged in. Striker brings up the fact that William used to be Steve Regal, not to be confused with "Mr. Electricity". Um, Matt? The audience is made up of 13 year-olds, and only 3% of them get WWE 24/7. I think we're safe on the confusion front. Finlay starts to fight back, but Henry gets tagged in and I start to fall asleep. Usual Henry offense, complete with stomps, clubbing forearms, and nerve pinches. Finlay fights up, but is met with a boot and Regal's back in. Kick/punch/knee gets two, and Regal slaps on a full nelson. Matt Striker's knowledge of wrestling history never ceases to amaze me. Too bad he works for a company that really doesn't care about wrestling history. Finlay sunset flip is countered by a Regal headbutt, and Bill gets two. Suplex into a pin is broken up by Matt Hardy, and Rhodes gets tagged in. Finlay meets him with a clothesline, and it's hot tag Kingston. Flying bodypress leads to the usual offensive flurry from Kingston, and his double legdrop gets two before Regal saves. Matt Hardy counters Regal, and Henry (rather sloppily) tags himself in. Kingston hits Henry with a series of kicks, but another bodypress gets turned into the World's Strongest Slam and that is all. Decent enough tag match to set up Survivor Series. **

A typical ECW episode. Largely skippable, but they highlighted all the right stuff for the PPV, and any time I get to see Finlay v. Regal, I'm a pretty happy guy.

Monday Night Raw in Review: 11-17-08

We kick things off a little differently this week, as Brian Gewertz obviously saw the news clips from the G-20 Summit, so the entire roster is in the ring for a "Superstar Forum". Aren't we supposed to call them "entertainers" now, Jerry? Anyway, Stephanie joins us, looking way too much like Sarah Palin. The roster is invited to ask questions, and everyone's favorite King of the Douchebags Randy Orton is up first. He wants to know why John Cena gets the Survivor Series title shot, and what makes him so special. Like any good politician, Steph deflects the question, blaming Shane for the Cena call, but John Cena is a top contender blah blah blah. I hope this segment is going somewhere. Cody Rhodes is up next, bitching about being on a team with the guy who kicked his buddy in the head. Steph blahs some more and sets up a lumberjack match between Orton and Punk. We finally start going somewhere as SANTINO! steps up to ask a question, which he will ask in the form of a rap. Watching the people in the ring who can't stay in character during the Santino show is priceless. Akward moment as Santino has a funny line on rapper Acorn, but Steph uses her powers of boring to step all over the punchline. Now we get JBL, asking where Vince is (oh god, we couldn't do "Vince is dead" so we're settling for "Vince is missing?"), and we set up Team Shawn v. Team JBL at the PPV. The Heartbreak Middle-Aged Man jumps JBL and steals the cowboy hat! Oh, it is on, bitch.

Kelly Kelly v. Victoria: The announcers let us know that we get a Diva v. Diva match at Survivor Series. Oh, joy. Punchy-kicky from Victoria turns into a sloppy hurricanrana from Kelly, who gets a surprisingly competent handspring elbow in before getting clotheslined for her troubles. Backbreaker from Victoria into the Arachnaphobia, but it only gets two. Kelly evaporates any good will by totally botching a corner spot, then gets a horrid roll-up for the pin. Ugh. Victoria nails Kelly from behind (I'd be pissed too if my opponent botched up a simple backbreaker spot) and a Widow's Peak brings out the babyface cavalry (which includes Jillian, because faces and heels and storylines don't matter when it's Raw v. Smackdown, baby!) and Beth Phoenix throws Victoria to the Raw wolves. Short and bad. 1/2*

Batista v. Manu: This is the singles debut for one-third of the second generation jobbers. Randy joins us as Manu gets a spike to the throat, and we get the obligatory Samoan headbutt spot only 15 seconds into the match. Attempted Batista Bomb is turned into a samoan drop as Manu is getting a shocking amount of offense in on the #1 babyface. Spinning heel kick gets two for Manu. He posts big Dave, then goes to the VULCAN NERVE PINCH OF DEATH! Man, two minutes in and both guys are blown up?! Dave fights out, but the shoulder gives way on the irish whip, and Manu gets a Real Estate Steve splash in the corner. That gets two, as does another headbutt to the shoulder, and the protection of Manu continues to amaze me. Batista gets a boot to the face and a spinebuster, but another B-Bomb gets reversed by Manu. Spear and a third attempt at the Batista Bomb finally ends it. A little plodding, but great psychology working the shoulder, and Manu wasn't made to look like a total chump. Call it **. Cody starts to get in the ring, but thinks better of it. Dave is sick of Randy, and he better worry about Survivor Series, not John Cena.

Boring Corporate Steph bring out CHEIF JAY STRONGBOW! Man, he doesn't look good, and it's not just the light pink polo shirt.

King Douchebag mocks Cody for not fighting Batista, and talks up his approching domination of C.M. Punk. Cody replies with "Keep talking, it's what you're best at." CLOWNED.

Todd Grisham intoduces a video package for Evan Bourne, highlighting his sweet Shooting Star Press, as well as the ankle injury. Considering he hasn't been around that long, Bourne gets a decent pop from the live crowd. Evan tells us he'll be ready to go, but his interview gets interrupted by Mike Knox and his beard. They just stare at each other, then Grizzly Knox heads to the back.

HBK and Rey Mysterio do a goofy bit that doesn't go anywhere (though Shawn gets a good knock in on Hulk Hogan's shitty CMT show), and Dolph Ziggler shows up randomly. Is it written into all the ex-Spirit Squad guy's contracts that HBK gets to humiliate them in perpetuity throughout the universe?

John Morrison and The Miz v. Rey Mysterio and Shawn Michaels: Shawn's Survivor Series team sounds really good until you get to that "Great Khali" part. Sweet opening sequence between HBK and Morrison, with nice double-teaming by Rey and Shawn. Rey shows Kelly how you're supposed to hit a hurricanrana, but goes for the 619 and gets tripped up by Miz. That gets a baseball slide and slingshot bodypress from Shawn, and Rey hits a painful looking slingshot bulldog into the announce table on Morrison as we go to break. Come back with the heels in control. Miz gets a bodyslam on Shawn, but a springboard legdrop misses. Rey tags in for another great sequence, but takes a sick bump into the post from the apron and is out of the ring. Double gut-buster by the heels, and Miz digs the knee into the back. Rey fights out and Morrison takes over. The Bret Hart chest-into-turnbuckle spot gets two, and Morrison slaps on an abdominal stretch, although Rey is so short it looks almost like a stump-puller. Miz comes in with some stomps and a legdrop and gets two for his troubles. Rey catches Morrison coming off the ropes with a dropkick and it's hot tag Shawn. In homage to Scott Keith coining the phrase for Bret Hart, I give you Shawn Michaels' FIVE MOVES OF DOOM: Flying forearm, inverted atomic drop, bodyslam, flying elbow, Sweet Chin Music. We only get four however, as Miz evades the superkick, and fights off the figure-four to boot! HBK no-sells the Flair flop and goes for a pin, but Morrison breaks up the count. It's PANDALERIUM in the ring, as Rey hits the 619 into Sweet Chin Music, but Morrison hits his own superkick for the pin on Michales! HBK v. John Morrison? I'm there, baby. ***1/2 for a great old-school tag match with four of the best in the business.

We get another great John Cena video package. Maybe if we put this much effort into guys who need to get over as opposed to the one's who are already over...

The best heel in the business and your World Heavyweight Champion CHRIS JERICHO is watching TV with Boring Corporate Steph. Cena is apparently a bad influence, and the only way to prevent total chaos on Raw is if Jericho retains the title this Sunday. Also, everyone wants Jericho to retain, even though they won't admit it. SAVE ME!

Grisham is back (again?!?) to interview C.M. Punk. We review Punk getting screwed out of the title. Punk is frustrated, so frustrated he can't deliver an interesting promo. Blah blah lumberjack match blah blah, Randy can't escape blah blah I've worked for everything I have. Anyway, it's payback time.

JBL and Kane in the locker room. JBL is a great leader, and feels they're compatible with each other. Kane makes his second reference to his fued with Shane McMahon in as many weeks, making me think we've got some call back to that storyline coming up.

Cryme Tyme v. JBL and Kane: JBL and JTG start, and I'm going to go crazy typing this. Irish whip gets the Goldust throat-thrust from JTG, and Shad is in. JBL comeback is stopped short, and a slingshot shoulderblock by JTG gets two. Cryme Tyme works the arm off frequent tags, but JTG puts his head down, allowing the forearm from JBL and the tag to Kane. Bodyslam and low dropkick by Kane, and then whe get all punch punch punchy. Side slam and a flying clothesline, but JBL tags himself in while Kane is signaling for the chokeslam. Clothesline from Wallstreet ends the match. Short and to the point *1/2.

Kofi Kingston and Evan Bourne get jumped backstage by Mike Knox and his beard. Kofi gets laid out, and while Bourne struggles to get up on his crutches, Knox calmly kicks him over in a great bit of douchebaggery, then hits Bourne's injured ankle with the crutch. I don't know if the matches will be any good, but the old school set-up is excellent.

Champion v. Champion: William Regal v. Matt Hardy. Neither title is on the line here. Bill cuts a promo, extolling the virtues of England and running down the U.S. Matt goes for quick pins early off of a schoolboy and a backslide, but Regal dumps him and nails him with a very slow kneelift. We go outside and trade faceplants into the apron, and the bullshit double count-out ends this early. DUD. They continue to brawl on the outside as the refs break it up.

Chris Jericho joins us in the ring for a chat. Jericho's story is much more impressive than Cena's, he tells us. We get a recap of his winning the undisupted title in 2001, the scramble match, and his dominance in ladder and cage matches. He's mad that he awesome skills are overshadowed by the Cena hype. Jericho's delivery is amazing in this. Note to aspiring wrestlers: Take. Acting. Classes. Anyway, Jericho is the true centerpiece of Raw since he's the champ (hard to argue with that logic), and he ends the fairy tale of John Cena at Survivor Series.

Lumberjack Match: Randy Orton v. C.M. Punk. They circle each other before the lockup, and engage in a nice reversal sequence, including a slick drop toehold into a front facelock by Punk. Orton tosses Punk, but he's back in before the heels can jump him. Randy gets the same treatment, but the faces simply shove him back in with no beatdown. Huh? A Punk schoolboy gets two, as does a backslide. Orton gets tossed again, and this time stupidly nails Jamie Noble, leading to a babyface beatdown. Now why would you provoke them when 30 seconds ago they gave you a pass? I guess that's why Randy Orton is King of the Douchebags. Orton back in, greeted by kicks to the quads by Punk. He accidentally posts himself however, and Mark Henry drags him out to Heel Land. Face-Heel showdown leads to Henry dumping Punk back in the ring for two. Orton stomps various extremeties, but does his videogame taunt and Punk catches him. Dropkick gets two for Orton, as does a knee to the back of the head, and we hit the chinlock. Punk fights up but gets stopped by a European uppercut and a scoop powerslam. Chinlock time AGAIN, as I get distracted by shots of D-Lo Brown, looking miserable and 30 pounds overweight. Spinning neckbreaker by Punk leads to a count by the ref, and Punk gets all punchy-kicky, but in the good, non-suck way. Kneelift-bulldog combo gets two, and Batista distracts Randy, allowing Punk to set up the GTS. Orton is able to counter and goes for the RKO, but a Punk dropkick sends him out to the heel side. Punk with a plancha wipes out Orton and some of the heels, but Regal distracts him long enough for Orton to hit the RKO and that is all. Aside from Randy's interminable chinlock sequences, nothing offensive. **3/4. Randy tries for the punt kick to put the exclamation point on his victory, but Big Dave stops him, and everybody fights with each other as we wrap the show up.

All in all, a good "go home" show for Survivor Series. All of the feuds were highlighted, and we got a sweet tag match to boot. We'll see if ECW and Smackdown can measure up.

"No" On Competent Campaigning

I'm a good lefty. I'm for equality for all, the separation of church and state, restrictions on assault weapons for civilians, and the right for a woman to have an abortion. Watching Barack and Michelle Obama on 60 Minutes last night, I almost suffered from toxic shock syndrome, watching a President on TV I actually like and respect. The 2008 election was mana from heaven for the most part, and if we can actually get a comedian into the United States Senate, that'll be the cherry on this particularly delicious political sundae, after 8 years of having to eat turdburgers for lunch.

The only fly in the ointment is the passage of Prop 8 here in California. I know similar legislation passed in other states, but we're the wacky, out-there state where we believe in crazy notions like rights for all people.

Let us be clear: If you supported Proposition 8, you are a bigot and a homophobe, and you are actively standing in the way for our progression as a society. To take rights away from anyone has nothing to do with Jesus, Joseph Smith, or the Flying Spaghetti Monster. It has everything to do with forcing inferiority upon another group of people. You made your bed with the racists who attacked interracial marriage for the same flimsy reasons you supported Prop 8: All I picture is a group of shrill Helen Lovejoy look alikes bleating "Won't somebody please think of the children!!!"

But shockingly, my beef is not with you small-minded religious-fascists out there on the interweb: It is with the people who ran the "No on 8" campaign.

Let me share a story with you. My wife and I went to the local Obama office on election day to drive people to the polls. We walked in that office, and it was electric. The human machinery was buzzing at a frenetic pace. Every time 5-10 people walked into the office, they got trained, were given a script, and asked to call certain battleground states. If was as perfect a political machine as I have ever seen. When we asked about driving people, the Obama rep told us they were not set up for that, and suggested we try the "No on 8" office on the floor below.

As we walked into the office below, we saw a total 180 from our previous experience. The No on 8 office was deserted: Maybe 5 people total, nobody on phones, and totally clueless with what to do with the two volunteers that walked into their office. Even after we said we could do other work besides drive people to polls (which they weren't set up for, either) their response was to give my wife a donut and send us back to the Obama people. It was as flawed a campaign office as Obama's was flawless.

So Prop 8 passes, and we get outrage, protests, marches, legal action, and special comments from Keith Olbermann. All warranted, but I ask: where was this before, when it could have helped? This was a proposition that aimed to fundamentally change our state Constitution. The simple fact that it made the ballot should have brought the post-8 panic to the fore. Had you substituted "homosexual" with any other minority group, you would have had riots in the streets. But because it is still socially okay to discriminate against the gay community, this absurdity was put on a ballot, and won!

And it won because not only did we take our opponents too lightly, but we took our own position for granted. We're California! We're cool! The citizens of this state surely wouldn't strip human beings of their rights! We put the "Left" in "Left Coast" for god's sake!

We tend to forget that Southern and Central California tend to vote like Alabama circa 1860. Coastal cities do not a progressive utopia make, and would you like some proof? Governors Reagan, Dukemajin, Wilson, and Arnie. We voted to persecute illegal immigrants (or those who just look like illegals) and we voted down the green revolution ten years ago. Just because we're progressive for the most part doesn't mean we can take that fact for granted.

With Prop 8, the left got sloppy, pure and simple. Yes, the "Yes" folks had all the crazy Mormon $$$, but I can't help but wonder: If the marches, the protests, the special comments, the genuine outrage, had occurred for 8 simply being proposed as opposed to waiting for it to pass, maybe that razor-thin margin that took rights away from human beings would have been on our side of the balance sheet.

Welcome to My World of Toys

Greetings!

Having finally decided to join the 21st Century, and seeing that my pregnant lawyer wife could put one of these together with all she has to get done during the day, I have given in and joined the blogosphere. I'm not here to start a revolution, and I doubt this will be seen beyond my friends and family who already have to put up with my opinion, but the writing bug has bitten me over the last few months, and given the extraordinary times we live in, it seemed like a good idea to begin putting down my thoughts on this series of tubes we call the interweb.

Come by for (hopefully) philosophical and humorous musings on politics, movies, TV, pro wrestling, comics, and all the other nerdy crap that my wife is way to good at putting up with. Plus, as we welcome our son into the world, I'll be posting on what it's like for a man who is two steps above being a child to have a child himself.

Stay Tuned...